Posts Tagged friends
Transformation Complete
Posted by Versa Dave in Social Media, Versa Life on August 21, 2011
I wouldn’t say that I was an early adopter or a revolutionary, but my presence in social media has certainly changed my life. The idea of socializing online fascinates me greatly; there is a piece of me that wishes this revolution had evolved in the 80s. Could you imagine…everyone toting their 80lb Commodore64 to the coffee shop just to “check in” and have conversation with their pals. Yes, I realize there were other methods in the 80s and I realize someone is going to stand up and say “I was using BBS long before Facebook” but the refinement of modern day social media is much more civilized than BBS (to a degree).
This past Friday night, I was fortunate enough to see a close friend of mine, Melissa Gilliam, before she moved on to a new chapter in her life. Melissa, passionately known as @MilliGFunk in the Twitterz, has been a friend for several years now. We met through Twitter, we became buddies, we hung out, we conversed, we chatted, we ranted, we shared emotions…we even walked in a parade together. I’m gonna miss this girl. She is going to change the lives of many in the Colorado Springs area. They don’t know it yet, but they’re about to get FUNKY.
As I sat among friends Friday night, we discussed our friendships and how they formed. I looked around the circle of companions. People like Karen Goodman and Bridget Frischer. People like Angela Vogel and Don Head. People like Tabitha Meyer and Michael Tomko. These were the people that made up a small portion of my circle of trust. In case you’re missing the point here, every single one of my friends that I was with on Friday night (with the exception of Don Head), I met through an online channel of sorts, whether it be Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, blogging or whatever other source you want to consider. This is HUGE! This is sort of mind blowing if you think about it. There has been a paradigm shift (like my use of business savvy terminology?) in my friend creating machine. I no longer have to stand on the loser wall in the school gym, hoping some girl is going to come by and choose me like I’m a ’78 Duster, “Ehh, this will do”. You know why I was on that loser wall to begin with? Because I, like so many others, have fears. We are genetically predisposed to have fears and social anxiety. Ok, maybe not all of us, but a lot of us.
It’s really difficult to put yourself out there and meet people face to face. The fear of rejection in person is enough to force folks to stay home and watch Dexter. Social Media has changed my life in this regard. Did you know that I’m 10x funnier online than I am IRL (that’s In Real Life for you n00bs)? Did you know that I’m ‘nearly’ 6’3″ and 240lbs? Of course you didn’t know that because pictures are not completely accurate in their projection of girth. Did you know that when I write or blog or tweet, I feel empowered? Did you know that when I speak IRL for the first time to a person, I’m often shaking so bad I have to clench my teeth? Of course you don’t know that because more than half, and maybe even as high as 70% of my circle of trust (or friends) evolved from online relationships. When I meet a person online and build that connection, meeting them in person is like shootin’ ducks in a barrel. I love it!! All of the anxiety and concern is magically dissipated. I feel at ease. And just in case you’re wondering…yes, I’ve been rejected online…it doesn’t hurt nearly as bad.
I don’t discriminate based on origin. Whether I met you at a coffee shop on a Saturday afternoon, or you started following me on Twitter, we’re friends. I like that when I tell my girls we’re going to meet friends for lunch, they say “Are these your Twitter friends?” because it gives me an opportunity to tell them that my Twitter friends ARE my friends. There is no distinction anymore. The transformation is complete.
My First Fitness Blog Post
Posted by Versa Dave in Versa Life on July 29, 2011
I’m not a fitness blogger. Or a runner, but I almost decided to add a new category about fitness just to have somewhere to add this post. Then it dawned on me. All those years of listening to my in-shape friends and watching countless wasted hours of informercials with Chuck Norris and that one guy from the Disney Channel that had really big man boobs and now only has little man boobs, taught me that it’s not about having an exercise regiment or a diet. It’s about changing your life. Being in shape, eating right, taking care of yourself…those are decisions that you make for the rest of your life so that you can live happily ever after. <<now I sound like the man boobs guy>> I proudly add this post to the “Versa Life” category.
There aren’t enough fingers and toes on this body to tell you how many times someone has told me that I just need to start running. Sure, I don’t hear very well, but I also don’t listen either. I could name at least 10 people right off the bat that are good friends of mine that run constantly and even enjoy the likes of marathons and other crazy runner events. Let’s face it…I’m surrounded by crazy runner people. They always talk about “the runner’s high”; they say there’s no other feeling like it in the world.
Last week, my good friend Meg Gartland pointed me to an app on the iPhone call myfitnesspal. She claimed it helped her to do all the things that traditional fitness record keeping methods couldn’t. I downloaded it, but didn’t really do anything with it. Over the weekend, I was at the mall with another good friend Amanda Quast, when I came across some really cool GPS watches by Nike and Garmin. I really wanted to get one, but not because of the fitness aspect…because of the geek factor. I mean really, how cool of a watch to have, but without the lackluster of telling people “Yeah, I’m a runner” it was merely just another geek purchase. Finally, Sunday night, I dusted off the ole Runkeeper app that I had downloaded for free months ago (you know, because it was free). I setup my new myfitnesspal account and set my alarm to wake up at 6:30am.
Monday morning 6:30am….came and went.
Tuesday morning 6:30am…came and went.
Wednesday morning 6:30am…WE’RE OFF AND RUNNING!! Here’s the deal…it sucked. I ran half a mile and I about puked on 2nd Street. As I walked, attempting to capture the last remaining breaths my body had, I half expected some sort of dancing purple elephant to come out from behind the light pole, or some cute little chubby angels playing harps to fly over my head. Where was this “runner’s high”? Did Meg and Jenn and the other Meg and Jodi and Cort and Angela all lie to me? Was this a scam!??
Turns out, you don’t get the high until about mile 4. Dang it!
A funny thing happened though on Wednesday night. I had the urge to go running again. I don’t like running though. I never have. It’s tedious and boring. There’s nothing remotely fun about it. I’d rather watch golf for 4 hours on TV…and I hate watching golf on TV. So I ran on Thursday morning…all of about .70 mile. Then guess what happened…I almost puked again on 2nd Street. And then, ooh ooh…guess what happened…I had the urge to run Thursday night! So I did pushups instead. And then this morning, Friday, I went and ran. FOR A WHOLE MILE!! Can you believe it!!?? What the heck happened to me? It’s like I swallowed a Tony Little video and now I can’t stop!!
Here’s the thing…I hope I don’t stop. I need this kind of daily exercise in my life. I’m not looking to become a fitness blogger. I’m not looking to get ripped and look like Hercules. I do however want to be around long enough for my kids to get married one day and for me to play with my grandkids the way my Dad plays with his. I’m not getting younger and I don’t have the fountain of youth. As big of a game as I might talk, I don’t want to grow old alone. There’s no joy in that. Grumpy old men might be cute on TV but when they tuck themselves in at night, they’re still alone and grumpy old men. I’m not going to allow myself to die a grumpy old fat man.
Now get off my lawn!!
Random Moments
Posted by Versa Dave in BingBong on February 5, 2011
As I make my way through the generational gaps, pillaging the years away, I find more and more that I have “consistent mannerisms”. Meaning, I fall into a rut and my fat ole butt is used to doing certain things. One particular such case is that I will purposely wake up in the morning at 5am, just so I can be alone. That doesn’t sound logical when I say it out loud. The point is, I enjoy the serenity of sitting at my desk while the sun is barely peeking over the old industrial train track bridge along Hwy 370. I sip on my coffee, cross my legs (like old men do), and use one hand to navigate my way through the morning interwebz.
I steered off course here. The point is, this morning, during my “old man time”, I was playing around with my screen saver options on the MacBook Pro. There is a default randomizer for your iPhoto pictures so I chose it and hit test. Since I have an external monitor that I display on as a secondary window, the randomizer chose 2 different pictures and alternated fading in and out. As I watched the pictures slowly scroll across my pixels, I began to get emotional. So many different images of just amazing events in my life from the last year or so. I saw one of Dylen’s surgery. I saw one of me and Don Head. I saw one from our summer road trip and I saw one of me and an ex-girlfriend. Very random moments. And I thought to myself, amidst all the stress of work and day to day life issues, I’m pretty lucky. I have much to be grateful for and the reality of it is…even when I think I have nothing, I really have it all.
Here’s a few random moments that I enjoyed this morning.
Honey, I’m Home
Posted by Versa Dave in Versa Life on January 6, 2011
The year was 1978. The Vietnam era was still wrapping up, Elvis fans were still mourning and I, at the tender age of 2 was about to be uprooted from the rural suburbs of Detroit. My dad decided to enlist in the US Navy even against the advice of his loved ones. Turns out, it very well could have been one of the best
decisions he ever made.
Over the course of my childhood, through circumstances dictated by the government or in some cases, family health, I made 8 different cities my home. I never had problems finding friends; leaving them each time proved to be a difficult task however. I was in many different elementary and middle schools but somehow I was fortunate enough to spend all four years in one high school. My brother was not so lucky and ended up in 3 different high schools spread out between Wisconsin, California, and Mississippi. This geographical game of life seemed to be perilous at times. Looking back though I see that it was merely another brick in the culmination of my constructive personality. I experienced different cultures, traditions and education, all in one country but vastly different. When I was in the 5th grade, square dancing was a requirement in the curriculum. Trust me, I couldn’t make that up. I lived through the great Hurricane Hugo of 1989. I spent summers on 8 Mile – yes, *that* 8 Mile. I’ve traded clothing with Russians – yes, in Russia. I’ve driven close to 200mph on multiple drag strips around the country. I made my first television commercial by the time I was 7. I’ve fired a 5″ 54cal Mark 45 gun off the fantail of the USS David R Ray in the middle of the Pacific and have the 3 foot long shell casing to prove it. I’ve had more surgeries from the neck up, than most people have visited a doctor at all.
Here we are in 2011, and I’m living in the Gateway to the West with 2 of the most beautiful and wonderful kids that God has put on this earth. January 11th will mark the 8th anniversary of my residence in this state. You may not give much acknowledgement to that, however for me, it is a great accomplishment. I am now proud to call Missouri my home state because it is officially the longest I’ve lived anywhere for a single period in my life. That may not hold true forever, but for now I’m going to embrace it. My life is wonderful. I have family that loves me. I have a humble home to call my own. I have a career that is growing and challenges me daily; I work with brilliant minds. My friends are of a flavor no man has ever known – they constantly amaze me with their zest, their compassion and their call to honor.
Maybe you live in Missouri; maybe you’ve lived here your entire life and see things differently. I encourage you to put on new glasses and view your home as not just the place where you squat at night, but your origin of sanctification. I encourage you to find that spirit of happiness that maybe you’ve lost because things have just been “the same” too long. Many of us spend our lives looking for that magical person or adventurous spot that will justify our very existence and fortify our quest, but often times, the very thing we’re looking for is the very thing we’re running from. Love yourself.
What Does Social Media Do For Me
Posted by Versa Dave in Versa Life on August 11, 2009
For years my mother always said I had an outgoing personality and was full of life. That may be true on most days and to some regard I have always been fairly vibrant in my social skills. Somewhere along the line though, there was a paradigm shift and my personal life took a slight left turn. Can I trace it back to any one particular event? Probably not. Am I just getting old? I hope not. Trends aren’t started because of ONE particular thing; ok, maybe they are (ie Michael Jackson and his red jacket). In this case, I’m confident in saying there were a multitude of resources that contributed to my evolutionary change in social personalities (yes, I know it’s plural and I meant it to be).
Society is over-run with social media networks these days. They are blasted in our minds all day long and for me to run down a list of them would just be superfluous at this point.
You can literally find a network for just about anything you’re interested in whether it be careers, industry driven, micro-blogging, photos/videos, and of course just you’re every day ordinary friends network. I’ve even seen one such site that tailors to a specific person. Imagine that…having a social media network that is engulfed with the haughty likes of one individual. You think that’s vain? Maybe, but it’s the internet.
Some, of course, have taken the approach of building their business with such resources. I don’t fault the hard working entrepreneur for wanting to advocate his/her business. After all, we all make futile attempts to market ourselves while scavenging through the virtual highways. All I ask is that they respect the members of the community.
As for me, I have nothing to promote or sell. Unless of course, I’m marketing Versa Dave as a brand, in which case, I am my biggest fan. As shocking as this may sound to some of my more seasoned readers, there tends to be a bit of shyness that kicks in when I’m in public meeting people for the first time. I imagine myself ackwardly stammering over my words in a new meeting or curling myself in a ball, tucked tightly on the loser wall. Over the years I’ve realized that it’s not necessarily that I’m lacking the self-confidence to project my existence, rather I fear the rejection that comes with lack of conversation or shifty eye movements.
Experience has given me circumstantial evidence that if I don’t feel a sense of openness from a person or crowd, then my chances of succeeding are narrow. There needs to be some kind of “open arms” mentality in order for me to progress. I don’t expect you to hug me or give me the fist-bop, but I need to know that you’re willing to speak to me and indulge in a real conversation without judging the situation or me.
For example. My buddies have told me on more than one occassion that I lack the gusto to go talk to a girl that I may find interesting or attractive. Why? Because that’s how society has bred our 21st century females. I’m sure my theory will be proportionately blown out of the water but it deals with security. Alot of women will assume that the reason you want to talk to them is so that you can get something (you know what I mean). Some women guard themselves so much with privacy gates built with Coach purses that a man is immediately intimidated into running in the other direction. This is a generalization of my experiences and in no way is meant to offend all women or characterize the entire gender.
Social media offers me this…an “in”. I can be me without hesitation or reservation. There are others like me…so many others. Even with the exchange of words over tiny pixelated strokes of ink, my confidence to talk to someone & socialize with them grows exponentially! There have been countless times when I met someone online and in our very first live assembly, I can converse like we’ve been friends forever. My true personality shines through and I’m open, free, and relieved of any fear because the barriers have already crumbled!
I contemplated how I would drop names in this article because while I have met many many friends, there are a few who have stopped my heart. If you are not mentioned, please do not be hurt. Your absence from this list does not mitigate our relationship at all. Also keep in mind that these are people I met THROUGH social media…hence proving my point of what social media does for me.
- @princessleah7x: Leah is one of the most exciting people I know. Mostly due to her young spirit I’m sure, but her attitude in life shines through in almost everything she does. She’s a sweetheart and has always been there for me to talk, lurking in the background of my Twitter stream and ready to DM when trouble hits.
- @mdhugo: Matt is an interesting situation because years ago, we worked for the same company, but not directly together. I knew OF him. It wasn’t until Twitter that we connected as friends. Matt and I have similar personalities. I value his input not only as a friend now, but also for his professional stature. I can honestly count him as one of my best friends now.
- @chinacat: Sonya was one of the first St. Louis based friends I ever made (at least in the first 10 I’d think). Her quirky geekiness is what appeals to me and her lively speaking tone is what holds me. I can talk to this girl forever it seems about literally nothing, but still have the most fun ever. She’s a rare breed and one that any network would be better off for having.
- @bekahclark: Not only does Bekah provide a witty sense of humor but she also knows how to be a friend. I don’t have many friends that fall outside of a +/- 10 year age difference, and Bekah falls right on that cusp…but I wouldn’t trade her for nothin’ (except maybe a lifetime supply of Kraft Macaroni & Cheese). She can get me riled up or she can bring me down from elevated blood pressure. Did I mention Bekah also drives a Versa? Same color and everything.
- @tgrossner: Tim and I work together…sort of. It’s a big place but we would have never begun a friendship if it weren’t for Facebook. As some people do, we befriended each other based on the fact that we both were employed by the same company. Tim reached out his hand though and we quickly became what I deem best friends after going to a Mother Grove concert. He has and will for years to come, be a staple of my life with his relentless acts of kindness. His family is top notch!
- @tojosan & @nanna_j: Todd and his wife Sharon are two of the nicest people you’ll ever meet in St. Louis. Todd’s commitment to the social media scene is unparalleled. I have always felt nothing but honesty and respect from Todd. Sharon is an absolute pleasure to talk to. Their happiness is clearly visible when they walk into a room and it intoxicates everyone. I love that even with Todd’s local fame on this scene, when I’m having a bad day, he & Sharon have time for me….and that makes me feel special knowing I have friends like them.
What does social media do for you? Does it provide an outlet for your emotions? Do you get to meet new & interesting friends? Are you promoting your business? What ever it is, I hope you’re happy. And remember, you’ll reap from social media only that which you sowed.














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